A Spider's Christmas
by Pharasight
Summary: So, how does the Genei Ryodan celecrate this winter holiday?One Shot Takes place right before the hunter exam.


**A Spider's Christmas**

Notes: This takes place just before the Hunter Exam. I do not own Hunter X Hunter...unfortunately.

Pakunoda sat on crate of an abandonned warehouse and waited for Kuroro to return from his "personal mission", it was almost Christmas eve and he should have came back two days ago.

"Where could he be!" A voice suddenly broke the silence, it was Uvo the loud one of the group who was now extremely frustrated over the matter. It was only a day away from taking their plan into action and their boss was nowhere to be seen.

"Shut up Uvo." Nobunaga's lazy irritated voice cut the giant's rampage short. "He'll come back when he comes back." Kurotopi nodded in agreement and hinted for him to stay calm. With hesitation Uvo stopped himself from squishing the furball and smashed a few crates. 'I'm heading out."

"Whats his problem?" Phinx got up and watched Uvo leave.

"I suppose everything," Feitan answered and grinned under his high collar.

"I'm baaaack-!" A voice sounded from outside and the figure slowly walked into the building. Everyone's head turned in hopes of Kuroro coming back but instead was a crazed magician shuffling his cards back and forth. "Missed me?" He taunted and leaned against the doorway.

"No." Machi simply said and turned her head away as everyone did so as well. Disspointed Hisoka shrugged and sat down with the rest of the Spiders.

"So, where were you?" Franklin asked, turning his head stiffly.

"Hunter exam, signed up a few days early. Y'know me." Hisoka grinned and lied down facing the ceiling and occasionally eyed Machi who had no interest what so ever.

"Ah." Franklin replied and turned back towards the window.

A day passed and still no sign of Kuroro, and not only Uvo, but the rest of the Spiders were getting restless.

"I suppose the mission has been aborted then." Pakunoda finally announced, taking her position as second-in command.

"I would have to agree with her, " Shalnark finally spoke and stood with Pakunoda signifying to be on her side.

"Fine." Uvo unwillingly agreed and again headed outside. "I mean -"

"But what if the boss comes back today?" Franklin interupted and stood up opposite to Shalnark.

"He won't." Kurotopi answered and pointed to the sunsetting. "Even if he comes, we won't have time."

"Well, less work for me," Nobunaga yawned and lied back down.

"Then, what shall we do in the mean time?" Hisoka slyly grinned, and continued to throw more of his cards at the wall as if playing darts.

"Well, I believe it is almost Christmas and we are free..." Feitan suggested leading the rest of the group in curiosity and to an awkward silence

"..." Said Bonorenofu silently.

"Christmas party?" Shizuku asked having no clue why the others were silent.

"All in favor say 'I', and all those other people who just want to sit and be boring keep quiet." Feitan shrugged and raised his hand "I."

'if you put it that way, I guess there is no harm." Franklin raised his hand as well. "I"

"I!" Hisoka enthusiasly shouted.

"Sure, whatever," Nobunaga raised his hand, and then lazily flopepd it back down.

"I," Machi reluctantly said, and the rest did the same.

"So what do we do for a party?" Shizuku asked again, and put away her book. The others gave her another awkward silence and thought.

"I'll check the net?" Shalnark scratched the back of his head and suggested holding up his cell phone.

"Sure," Phinx shrugged and walked off.

Another day passed.

"I got something!" Shalnark shouted, waking the rest of the members as they went over to his computer.

"Secret Santa?" Machi asked in confusement, as she began to read the instructions in fine print.

"Sounds interesting," Kurotolpi added and also began to read the text.

"This is going to be SUCH a GREAT Christmas!" the insane magician clapped his hands together and also began to read the text, -having an excuse to stand beside Machi.

"..." Added Bonorenofu and sat back down.

"Sounds alright," Pakunoda shrugged and rubbed her head.

"Yeah,"

"So, whoever we pull out we have to give a Christmas present to, and tomorrow you will all find out who you got your present from. Got that?" Shalnark read from the computer screen and also holding a hat with slips of paper inside where names of each person was written.

"Sounds fair," Said Feitan and Franklin agreed. One by one they drew out of the hat and shalnark took the last slip.

"Well, we have 12 hours, once you get the present just put it under the person's name." Shalnark added and pointed to a stack of crates with each of their names taped above them.

"Uvogin." Read Phinx as he walked through the aisles of the local drug store. _I'll just get him some slim-fast pills, I mean he is getting a little out of shape. _He shrugged and just purchased them without a second thought. It was only for a buck fifty so he didn't care much. Wrapping the item in a hurried fashion, he wrote in the words: 'It's for your own good.' and threw it onto the crate.

"Shizuku." Machi read, and then went off to the local office suply store purchasing a red agenda. _Matches Deme-chan_. She thought and then put the book in a bag. 'So you won't keep forgetting'. She wrote.

"Phinx." Bonenrenofu thought,

"Borenofu." Shalnark stared at the iece of paper and wondered what he would like, he barely talked and didn't really have a personality. _Maybe I'll just get him some pants, he's probably already sick of that loincloth. _Shalnark wrapped the piece of clothing in some paper and added: 'So you won't be as naked. LOL.' (Shalnark uses msn right?)

"Feitan." _I'll just get him a new issue of playboy, he'd like that..that little pervert. _Franklin laughed as he placed the magazine into an envelope and put it under 'Feitan'.

"Pakunoda." Kurotopi thought as he walked throughout the mall. _Highheels_. he simply put it and went straight into a women's shoe store, purchasing a pair of high bright-red stiletto shoes. He shrugged and placed them back into the box.

"Hisoka..." Shizuku adjusted her glasses, and thought. _He is a magician, and usually magicians have rabbits!_ Happily she went into the toys department of the supermarket and bought a cute white stuffed rabbit. _Hope he'd like it._

"Shalnark" Feitan pondered and walked by an electrical store. Nah he probably already has all these nifty gadgets. Finally, he decided upon a giant computer manual with all the latest updates on the internet. This would probably keep him entertained for a bit. Feitan smirked and purchased the book.

"Kurotopi." Uvo read and directly went into the barber's shop, purchasing a giftcard. (Do barber shops have giftcards? I really wonder..) _He hasn't cut his hair in ages, this will do him good! _'Get a haircut' he wrote and tossed it on his crate.

"Machi." Nobunaga read, and scratched his head. _Aw man, it's a girl._ he thought and went to the woman's section of the mall. _Girl's like dresses..yes...I'll get her a dress._ he finally decided on and got her a light blue sundress which was on sale for seven dolalrs. Just like Phinx he clusily pakaged it and threw it under her name.

"Franklin." Hisoka read, and began to once again shuffle his cards. _Hmmmm, this is a little of a sticky situation._ Thought the crazed magician and finally decided on a solution. He put twenty-dollars in an envelope with the words: "Save it up for a cosmetic surgery, " and placed it under his name, proping it up with one of his cards. (Hisoka just has to do things in a fancy way,)

"Nobunaga." Read Pakunoda as she walked through a busy crowd of people last-minute Christmas shopping just like her. _Forget it. _She thought, and decided not even to get him a Christmas present.

That night Kuroro finally returned and without knowing he threw his trench coat over the crates knocking off the boxes. Thinking that it was not an important matter he picked them up and placed them back onto the crates in no special order.

"Kuroro, I see you're back." Pakunoda half-asleep said rubbing her eyes. "We had to cancel the mission."

"It's my own fault, and I apologize to you and the rest of the spiders for this." Kuroro replied and bowed his head lightly.

"Get some rest, Christmas tomorrow." Pakunoda said and also bowed her head in respect.

_Since when did we care about Christmas?_ Thought Kuroro.

"WHAT THE HELL!" Yelled Uvo as he unravelled his 'present' to find a pair of red highheels. "KUROTOPI WHAT IS THE MEANING OF THIS!"

"I knew that you cared! I will never ever forget you! And red! Symbolizing love!" Hisoka pleasingly smiled to Machi and attempted to give her a big loving hug. Machi punched him right in the face and glared down at her own present.

"Save it up for cosmetic surgery?" He glared at Hisoka and her aura thickenned horribly.

"Oh gee thanks...I've always wanted for one of these." He looked at the adorably stuffed rabbit and sighed.

"Won't be as naked?" Pakunoda read as she looked at her revealing attire, "Are you mocking me Phinx?" She pulled out her gun angrily.

"A haircut?" Bonenrofu rubbed his bald head.

Shizuku pulled out the magazine from the envelope and her innocence suddenly vanished. "What?" She stared at the magazine.

"Nobunaga...I'm going to kill you." Feitan calmly said and threw the sundress in his face, charging at the man.

"It will do me good?" Kurotopi looked at the bottle of pills then at his own short almost-anorexic body.

"Oh gee, I spent the whole night looking for this game and I didn't get anything. You guys are the best." He said sarcasticly and pouted.

Looking down at the manual Franklin stayed silent and then looked over to Feitan who was brutally attacking Nobunaga. "What is it?" He asked.

"Looks like I was the only person who got an appropriate present." Laughed Phinx, and tried to back away Pakunoda.

"I bet he was the one who messed up the presents!" Uvo yelled and pointed at Phinx. As they all began to beat him ruthlessly, Kurorosat in the corner and thought.

_Should I tell them?_

Yays, I really don't care about grammar/spelling. Deal with it.  
-Written for a oneshot contest

Pharasight


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